I was a Lady Godiva Memorial Bnad groupie

The great man himself, Charles Bukowski

The great man himself, Charles Bukowski

This is my first feeble attempt at a “Charles Bukowski” style poem. I know it’s hideous, so try not to laugh too hard. And, by the way, there is nothing biographical about this poem AT ALL! SNICKER! SNORT!

Lady Godiva

LGMBpatch

I played the bedpan
In the Lady Godiva Memorial Bnad

Wearing a yellow hardhat
Covered
In slogans.

9T3, Oh Goo! Harf up a lung!

I did it all
In the New College
That was my home
My sisters
My family

I drank peach schnapps
Straight from the bottle,

A liquid education
Mixing drinks
With chemical precision.

A party cup
Of Long Island Iced Tea
To wash down
The quadratic equations.

Rum and Coke
Seemed a biological
Requirement.

Tequila with beer chasers
Was more than a
Trivial Pursuit.

My lowest
Was gin
And apple juice.

Vomit
Blackout
A mat on the bathroom floor
To blot the
Juices of others.

The thermodynamics
Of university passion;
A PowderPuff halfback
In a Devonshire universe.

Of garbage can liquor
And toga party chasers.

Staggering Spadina senseless.

Sex in communal showers,
Sex in dorm room bunk beds,
Sex in restaurant washrooms,
A merry widow of straps and
Tangled limbs
Handcuffs and fellatio.

Garters, stockings,
Teddies and Clancy.

Holding hands
In the darkness,
Lips and tongues
Together.

Engineering
A Skule education
With
A pre-med major

On my back
At the
University of Toronto.

Want to know more about the bnad?

I never played with the Bnad when this happened - way before my time!

I never played with the Bnad when this happened – way before my time!

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3 thoughts on “I was a Lady Godiva Memorial Bnad groupie

  1. Pingback: Poetry about alcohol and drinking | Lords of the Drinks

    1. manuregurl Post author

      Those were the days. Unfortunately, I can only remember small snippets of it due to being so drunk most of the time. I do remember playing at the Old Mill and travelling on the subway in the full Lady Godiva bnad uniform – the naked woman on my shirt drew a lot of interest from fellow riders. I also remember when the firing of the cannon set off the smoke alarms in the Royal York Hotel and there was a wedding reception going on in the next ballroom. The rest is just a haze.

      Reply

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